life

Meat or Manna

| Chris

Today’s contemplation…

“If only we had meat to eat! … But now we have lost our appetite; we never see anything but this manna!” ~Numbers 11:4,6

Discontentment. Ingratitude. If we’re truly honest, we’ll admit we all have these in us to some degree. They can be elusive, invisible or incognito even. A bit hard to spot at times. I don’t know about you but I struggle against it just about everyday. Even when I try not to show it, I can be a grouch deep inside.

Sometimes, our choice between meat or manna can be a matter of life and death. It’s a tough battle. Choose wisely.

@2002 Chris Alma Jose

How Great Thou Artist

| Chris

HeadshotIt is true! Art imitates life.

As I was winding down an After Effects video project at work today, something dawned on me: The implementation of special effects on any media, for the most part, is but an attempt to recapture life’s imperfections and limitations which modern technology seems to have now alleviated. SFX, in fact, puts the “mistakes” back where they belonged.

How ironic that we actually, albeit unknowingly, appreciate the inadequacies of human nature. Could it be because perfection is so far off that we’re just not able to relate? Or that our shortcomings are all that we’re familiar with? We accept the fact that we miss the mark. We miss the goal. Yes! And in that painfully honest truth is where we genuinely find real beauty.

Consider a photographer who dramatizes his perfectly looking photograph by adding a touch of sepia to it, making it look “aged.” That’s right. Because “perfect” is boring! A little rough on the edges is who we really are. All of us. And to flaunt that… is cool!

Consider a film maker trying to capture the mood of the past in his story by shooting in black and white. A musician who creates music with the aid of modern gadgets that replicate the sound of the 50’s. I could go on and on. But you get my drift.

We are poetry in motion, ya’ll. Warts and all. And with that said, the next time you marvel at a modern piece of art – be it visual, sound or otherwise – remember that life itself is the original work of art.

Oh yes… How great thou Artist!

New thoughts for a new year

| Chris

Is it too late for a resolution? Not that it matters, really, as I have no intention of making one now. However, I have experienced and learned simple things in the past few years that has made me think about how easily we can take things for granted. Simple things which can enable the quality of our lives to improve greatly, if only we’re constantly aware of them. Little things like smiling at strangers, driving slowly, overlooking what seems to appear like an insult, dancing in the shower and smelling the morning air (indeed, one of the perks of living in the sticks is having breathable air).

We don’t necessarily have to go to extremes to change our lives for the better. All there is to it is simply being mindful of the condition of our hearts, at all times. Things don’t always go our way, but we can learn to adopt in an imperfect world by realizing we’re no better either and that we don’t deserve what we already have now. An attitude of gratitude really goes a long way. It cures us of depression and loneliness, it allows us to forgive and grants us freedom from within. Sometimes, life gets difficult and when there seems to be nothing to be grateful for, the challenge is to keep looking, anyway. For the truth is, that the blessings are always there, whether or not we see it.

Speaking of which… how could it be so hard to feel blessed right now, in light of the current devastation and enormous loss of life in Haiti? That could’ve involved you and me.

Anyhow, I thought it would be good, for me anyway, to spell those little things out and write about them, every now and then. It will be a good reminder for me that there are things I ought to put in practice, on a daily basis. These are things that I want to implement in my everyday living, starting this year. That’s right, there’s always room for improvement. And the road may be a long one, but the journey has already  begun.

Hittin’ the road

| Chris

In a few hours, I will be embarking on a road trip that’ll take me all around the rocky mountains. It should last me a good couple of weeks to do this, especially being the Sunday driver that I am. But it’ll be fun and I’m looking forward to seeing family and friends in Phoenix, as well as the Grand Canyon. Yes, it’s been 9 years since my last visit to this incredible “must see before you die” place. There’s a lot to see out there and I really don’t have any hard plans. I’ll just drive and drive and see where I end up. I think that’s part of the excitement, not knowing what’s ahead but looking forward to the adventure and fun of it all. And what a way to spend Christmas! I haven’t done a major road trip in a long time and it’s about time I got out of the house and did it.

Worry not as I will be bringing a camera to document my trip. Expect to see them sometime next month, most probably on my Flickr page. Speaking of which… Yes!!! I sucked it up and went Pro! So, I should have plenty of space for the photographs.

If I don’t get to blog during my trip (I’ll try), I want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Be safe as I plan to be. Love, peace and green cheese! I will see you on the other side…

Now, where was I? Oh yeah… packing!

Organically speaking…

| Chris

Some people have begun noticing the change in my eating habits. Including me! For about a year now, my diet has been for the most part, organic and health centric. I say, it’s not really my eating habits that’s changed as much as it is my outlook in life. And that outlook just happened to involve an awareness in personal responsibility. Responsibility towards health and nature, that is. Hence, my reason for taking the organic route.

First of all, I believe organic food is healthy, not necessarily in a physical sense but more in a perspective of wellness. For me, it means a little peace of mind. The peace from knowing I cared, even if it’s just a little bit. It’s a good feeling to know that I care, respect and am thankful not only for my health, but also for nature and the folks responsible for my being able to eat clean food. That, to me is giving importance to the wellness of my own being. Now, if that’s not being healthy, I don’t know what is. Hey, let’s just say, if I could choose food that has less chances of chemical contamination, why shouldn’t I? I’m sure the regular variety won’t kill me anytime soon (it hasn’t, in the past 45 years) but if it doesn’t give me peace of mind anymore, what good is it for me?

Another thing I should note is that organic food may or may not taste better than non-organic varieties. In my experience, a lot of them do, but some don’t. However, that is the least important factor, in my opinion. I didn’t choose organic products because they taste better. If they do, it’s simply icing on the cake. Choice is a matter of principle. What we believe in and what we care about. I believe that whatever we decide to eat is a very personal choice. The way we shape our diet is from the knowledge we gain from a desire to understand, as well as our own fundamental beliefs, if we have any.

Unless we grow our own food, we’re stuck with what society feeds us. We’re force-fed with very limited choices, in stores or even in restaurants. There’s not as much control we can get when eating out as we do from when we’re cooking our own food. By the way, it is important to know how to cook, if only for this reason alone. But… that’s for another story.

Okay, let’s be honest and take the marketing labels out of the picture. Wouldn’t most of us choose organically produced food if the price was the same as the ones that aren’t? I hate that it costs so much to buy organic – it makes no sense, I know – but if that’s what it takes for me to gain peace of mind, then it is my responsibility to adjust my finances to fit my priorities in life. After all, the length of my life isn’t as significant as its quality. And quality is subjective to each person’s decisions. However, at the end of the day, practicality is still just as important as sensibility. I hate snobbery of any kind! It’s what makes sincere attempts to do good look suspect in many people’s eyes. And that’s what stereotypes a worthy lifestyle. That’s what reduces a good habit into a mere fad.

We make decisions in life according to the level of responsibility we are willing to take. Just like anyone, I have mindlessly eaten countless amounts of junk food in my life. And believe it or not, it doesn’t bother me much to this day. It’s just that now, I’m a little more aware of how much responsibility I am willing to take, whenever I do it again. I may eat healthy all week and decide to pig out at KFC one day. No guilt there. Or, if I decide to buy a more costly bag of healthy groceries at the expense of a road trip or a fun weekend somewhere, so be it. Or if I’m invited to a backyard bbq over at a friends house, I’d enjoy that big fat burger just like anyone would, with no hesitations. I call that… life. That’s right! I stand for life, not religion. When lifestyle becomes religion, life is robbed of its freedom.

Now, our decisions will always cost us something, no matter what it is. All I can say is that after a year of gaining health awareness, its effects have drastically transformed, not only my body, but my mind and spirit as well. Now, if that wasn’t worth the cost and trouble, I don’t know what is.

So I say… simply live life to the full because that’s all that matters, really. And organic or not, we still need to eat our vegetables.

There’s more to the picture than meets the eye

| Chris

flickr-icon-19Hey hey, my my… I need help!

I just realized my cooking adventure of late had left me with a ton of photos to upload on Flickr. I’ve been on the photo-sharing site for over 3 years now and never thought I’d manage to fill up the 200 pic limit, ever. But here it is… I’m just about to hit the mark and the site’s been bugging me for over a month… Go Pro, bro!!! Well, looking at the big picture, I love photography and I’d probably won’t stop taking pictures anytime soon. And so, after a bit of research, reading on people’s opinions and experience, I’m finally on the verge of deciding to suck it up and, well… go Pro!!!

That’ll set me back 25 bucks! Ouch! So much for my holiday shopping.

Well okay, maybe not. But I’m actually hitting Arizona for the Christmas weekend and I plan to shoot like a maniac while I’m down there. I wonder how much cactus photography I can take. So anyway, I would really need the unlimited web space that Flickr’s Pro account offers. Besides, it would be nice to finally be able to organize my pics into multiple sets. And the groups! I love the groups and the discussions. Interactions with other folks have been incredibly helpful, educational and inspiring.

I’ve also wrestled with switching to other sites like Photobucket and Zooomr. I considered Smugmug as well, but they’re even more expensive. I don’t know. Is there really more to the picture than meets my wallet? Just want to make a sound decision, that’s all.

So, should I or should I not go with Flickr Pro? Someone help me decide, please.

Show, don’t tell

| Chris

“We don’t need no education. We don’t need no thought control.”

Someone came up to me the other day asking how much I charge for guitar lessons. Happens a lot, actually. Usually, after some sort of goofy performance I did. Unfortunately, I have to be a bearer of bad news by saying I don’t teach. Not anymore, that is. But not because I don’t want to. I just don’t think – and this from experience – that mere “teaching” is effective and productive in a real world situation. Just because I graduated from college doesn’t mean I’ve got it all figured out, does it? Some people who never went to school are more substantially successful than the ones holding a degree.

you can do it

You see, I don’t want my “students” to do stuff simply because I said so. I expect them to challenge me and prove to themselves that they can do better than what I’m telling them to do. I expect them to step outside the realms of the norm. To carve out a distinct identity for themselves. An identity that flaunts progress, not nostalgia!

So, what am I talking about here? Intense motivation and passion. We can read all the books in the world and spend half our life in school, but if we’re not willing to die for something, we’ll probably either quit at some point or simply dwell in lukewarmness and mediocrity. And what a waste of time that is. How boring that makes for one’s life, whether ours or that of the ones we could have a chance of making a difference towards.

Most of what I am today is, in fact, a product of inspiration from people I’ve personally decided to look up to, over the years. These folks didn’t try to walk me through life, I simply chose to watch them in action. Heck, a lot of them failed many times. Yet, I followed and learned from reality instead. I guess, they must’ve been doing something that’s hard to ignore, whether in the form of words or deeds. Nonetheless, it was definitely effective.

I’ve never been a fan of learning by-the-book. I’m not saying we can’t get anything from it or that we shouldn’t. It’s just that when the book becomes the be-all-end-all, we become a slave to someone’s own thoughts and opinions. Our mind cannot, or rather, will not “break the rules” because we’re not able to see beyond those “rules.” And beyond is where the unknown universe lies. Beyond is where we find our true and unique selves.

A recipe calls for a clove of garlic. I put in five… so, sue me!

When one is not aware of the consequences, neither will the benefits be obvious. We learn truly from our own mistakes, not from that of others. We can’t possibly understand someone’s pain until we feel it ourselves. Why limit someone’s imagination, then? Why be the judge of what is “right” and “wrong?” Don’t we all have the capacity to make that decision for ourselves? What is the real issue here? Trust? Fear? Control? Insecurity? For instance, I’m not for abortion. I don’t recommend it. It is against my beliefs. But I certainly won’t think less of someone who decides otherwise. I may not agree, but I accept. Whether there are consequences or rewards, my only business in it is acceptance. So, why do we impose our man-made laws as if our opinions matter more than that of others. Why do we shove our morals down people’s throats… and call it love? Good luck gaining converts that way.

What I believe is that people need to inspire, as well as be inspired. We need to be heroes as much as we need heroes in our own lives. We need to show examples as well as we need to be shown examples. Real world examples. Ones that produce results. Because results are effective. We’ve all heard the cliche – We should be the change we want to see in the world. It’s true. But in the same token, we shouldn’t expect anyone to follow our lead. We can only be sincere in wanting to do our part without expecting anything in return. Yet, if we’re motivated enough, passionate enough, persevering enough… maybe, just maybe, there’s a chance we’ll turn some heads and raise some eyebrows. And to me, that’s a job well done already.

Just my 2 cents…

Oh by the way, still insisting on guitar lessons? Well, if you can handle a boot camp and promise not to quit, no matter what… rip me off for $30/hour.

Otherwise, stick to RockBand.

Contentment + Gratitude = Peace

| Chris

peaceIn light of the current economic recession, I found myself pondering lately on how I’m incredibly blessed to have a stable job, right now. And not only is it stable, I truly feel that with this job, I am being paid for my hobbies, too! To wake up on Monday mornings excited to go to work is something I don’t take lightly. I am grateful that I am not only passionate about the work that I do, but also because I work with people whom I trust and consider friends… a very important factor, I believe. I can honestly say that in the last four years working where I work, I haven’t felt an ounce of stress, at all. Being in the office, in fact, does not feel all that much different from staying at home, either. This is just ridiculously good! Sometimes, I can’t help but wonder how much longer I can get away with it.

But even that’s only the beginning.

The real story I wanted to tell here is what dawned on me, this past couple of days. I realized that I have been debt-free for exactly one year now. Yes!!! I was able to pay off everything I owed right about the time the economy was beginning to falter. After having religiously lived like a broke college student (okay, I’m exaggerating a bit, but you know what I mean…) for many years, I was now able to breath freely and… well, not hesitate to fill up the tank and go for a joy ride, every now and then.

But wait… here’s the cherry on top of the whipped cream. Right after my debt was paid off, I set up an automated savings account just so I can get myself back to financial normalcy without having to think about it, all the time. Now, I had forgotten about this account. Yesterday, I decided to give it a look. Well, what do you know? I was surprised to find in there – well, let’s just say a substantial amount I’ve never had before! Just like that! I was like… gee wiz, if not for my occasional trips to Guitar Center (which, by the way, can be hazardous to a struggling musician’s financial health), I would’ve ended up with much more! Haha! Nope, not complaining at all!

Anyhow, I’m not saying this is a lot or even a big deal of a case. Circumstances are obviously different for everyone. But for a single guy who loves the simple life and doesn’t need much (well, sans the occasional musical acquisitions), this is absolutely monumental. Yet, I don’t think my spending habits have changed much at all, after all these years. When you’ve trained yourself to be content out of necessity, contentment eventually becomes a comfortable way of life… even long after necessity has expired. And this goes beyond mere finances, of course! When you are grateful for the littlest things that come your way, trust me, the peace it allows you is simply priceless. And no matter where we’re at in life, isn’t peace what we all crave for, ultimately?

I thought so. Especially, in times like these.

Ask not

| Chris

Sometimes, I find myself being frustrated with my church. You know, like I want it to be a certain way but it’s not. If it only does this and not that. Or, if only they have this and not that. Whatever.

Every church has its own culture. For the most part, that culture rubs off from that of its surrounding community and society. The church I’m in now isn’t the one I grew up in. And neither is the city. I will forever be the new kid in town, where I am right now. But that’s not my point.

serve

It’s not necessarily wrong to desire for a change in one’s religious culture – be it of the church or society – if you’re willing to do the work. It’s going to take an enormous amount of time and effort to do it (especially for a stranger like me). And on the way, there will be resistance of all kinds. Don’t believe me? Go, ask Jesus.

Me? Actually, I’m willing. Maybe, I’m just unable. Or so, I think. Anyhow, just because I’m used to certain things doesn’t mean it has to be that way all the time. Right? Well, there’s my excuse! Flexibility is beneficial in life. I realize that in most churches, people come and go because they church-hop hoping to find the “right” church for them. And I can understand that. To a degree, that is. I’m beginning to see that this can, indeed, become a sin as well. Trying to be in control when God should be. Giving in to what we want instead of looking beyond our circumstances to see what God is trying to say to us. Finding the perfect church is a futile attempt, I think. Any church “can” be the right church, if only we listen closely to what God is telling us instead of what we’re trying to tell ourselves. A desire for convenience can sometimes lead our hearts astray. It’s a comfort zone issue.

Bottom line is, as long as humans stay imperfect, we’ll never find the “perfect” church. However, we will always find our hearts, regardless of its condition, in any church we’re in. And I certainly don’t want to find my heart in a bad condition at a church that God has put me in. I want to find out what he has in store for me. I’m sure it is good. I know it is. Maybe, I won’t find it today. But I trust that someday, I will. Like the saying goes – In his time.

So meanwhile, I say… Ask not what your church can do for you, but what you can do for it. For by this, God’s voice will resonate louder than ours so that our purpose will become clear to us. We will then find an answer to our questions and meaning to our lives.

God bless.