god

Trust no one

| Chris

When I first moved to Hollywood, CA back in the late 80’s, I remember it being a time of discovery. A time I was beginning to learn the ropes of life away from the comforts of my own hometown. I lived near Sunset and La Brea where, back in those days, the craziness was at its peak. Or so, it seemed. It was supposed to be a bit scary actually, but I wasn’t scared at all. I thought it was just festive and that’s what I liked about it.

catch

One night, I remember driving to a Laundromat down on Sunset to wash my clothes. I had a boatload and needed a ton of quarters to get them all washed. So I used the bill changer to get my quarters. Now, most of the washers were in use at that moment, and I had to wait till they’re done. Since I had time, I thought I’d go next door to grab a slice of pizza. What I did before I went out is that I left all my quarters sitting on top of the washer. When I came back, the maintenance lady got on my face and said, “Are you nuts, leaving your money out here? This is Hollywood, boy! You’re lucky I knew it was yours and I made sure no one took it.”

Well, I thanked the lady and went on my merry way. Then it dawned on me later, I left the money there thinking it’s no big deal. Hollywood, schmollywood! Why would anyone steal it, I thought? I mean, that’s crazy talk! Who in their right mind would do such a thing?

Needless to say, I eventually learned that a lot of people, in fact, aren’t in their right minds, at times. Me, included! Imagine that. So now, I had to go from knowing nothing to knowing too much! I had to go from being naive to being suspicious. From being carefree to being careful. From trust to doubt. Smooth to scarred. It’s what the world calls… being wise.

But isn’t that what the world teaches, anyway? Really. To trust no one? I wonder sometimes, if the ones who consider themselves experienced, learned, wise… the ones who say, “enough is enough” or “no more”… I wonder if they still experience true happiness and contentment? I wonder if they’re still able to love unconditionally? To be sincere and compassionate? It’s hard to imagine. Or what if they are, indeed, wise enough to admit that they have been scarred? That they have certainly lost their spiritual virginity and have become a victim of this enslaving world that rejects God?

I am a victim. But I also admit to having allowed myself to be one. And I am just now getting myself back to where I used to be. Back to where it’s safe. Back to where there is freedom. And pure joy. Back to the world of trust. Hey, “wise” can sometimes be overrated, you know?

The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?  ~ Psalm 118:6

Almost there… I hope you’re waiting.

Ask not

| Chris

Sometimes, I find myself being frustrated with my church. You know, like I want it to be a certain way but it’s not. If it only does this and not that. Or, if only they have this and not that. Whatever.

Every church has its own culture. For the most part, that culture rubs off from that of its surrounding community and society. The church I’m in now isn’t the one I grew up in. And neither is the city. I will forever be the new kid in town, where I am right now. But that’s not my point.

serve

It’s not necessarily wrong to desire for a change in one’s religious culture – be it of the church or society – if you’re willing to do the work. It’s going to take an enormous amount of time and effort to do it (especially for a stranger like me). And on the way, there will be resistance of all kinds. Don’t believe me? Go, ask Jesus.

Me? Actually, I’m willing. Maybe, I’m just unable. Or so, I think. Anyhow, just because I’m used to certain things doesn’t mean it has to be that way all the time. Right? Well, there’s my excuse! Flexibility is beneficial in life. I realize that in most churches, people come and go because they church-hop hoping to find the “right” church for them. And I can understand that. To a degree, that is. I’m beginning to see that this can, indeed, become a sin as well. Trying to be in control when God should be. Giving in to what we want instead of looking beyond our circumstances to see what God is trying to say to us. Finding the perfect church is a futile attempt, I think. Any church “can” be the right church, if only we listen closely to what God is telling us instead of what we’re trying to tell ourselves. A desire for convenience can sometimes lead our hearts astray. It’s a comfort zone issue.

Bottom line is, as long as humans stay imperfect, we’ll never find the “perfect” church. However, we will always find our hearts, regardless of its condition, in any church we’re in. And I certainly don’t want to find my heart in a bad condition at a church that God has put me in. I want to find out what he has in store for me. I’m sure it is good. I know it is. Maybe, I won’t find it today. But I trust that someday, I will. Like the saying goes – In his time.

So meanwhile, I say… Ask not what your church can do for you, but what you can do for it. For by this, God’s voice will resonate louder than ours so that our purpose will become clear to us. We will then find an answer to our questions and meaning to our lives.

God bless.

Got ten thousand talents?

| Chris

standout

As usual, I played music for our worship team at church this morning. It wasn’t anything new or spectacular. Just another Sunday service full of technical difficulties and an out-of-tune guitar (mine). Glad no one noticed. In fact, I was on my way out to the parking lot when a flattering voice came from behind.

You have great talent, Chris!

Now, I don’t mean to toot my own horn but I have to admit, this wasn’t the first time that’s happened to me either. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the sentiment. However, every single time it happens, I’m always confused as to whether or not it’s something I’d really like to hear. Well, rather than, say… “You’re a good man, Chris!”

And to make matters worse, the sermon this morning dealt with the scripture about The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant and let me tell you, did it have something new to tell me this time around! I know the story is about forgiveness, however, something else came up to me while reading it. I see that Jesus is comparing the magnitude of having to forgive a debt of ten thousand talents (millions of dollars) as opposed to just a hundred denarii (a few dollars). Now, we’ve all read the famous Parable of the Talents where burying your talents is said to be a very bad thing. Talent is a good thing. Talent is a gift. It needs to be multiplied, shared and used for God’s work. Just like money, it’s a currency that needs to circulate. So, back to the first parable, it showed me that a talent is something we owe God. And talent is something we all have in some capacity, believe it or not.

Perhaps, this is the reason I am uneasy everytime I hear a flattering statement about my talents. It’s probably because I don’t like the idea that I’m indebted. And just like money, talents can lead you to places you don’t want to go. Just like money, it can be used as an instrument of both good and evil.

Speaking of talent, I can boast of one I know I’m really good at… sinning. Yep, a recurring talent, if you will. As well as a debt I can never repay.

How about you? You got talent? How much?