I love the calmness of my new neighborhood. Outside my front door is a porch overlooking the great wide open. For a moment, I stand outside in the cold. The only sound I hear is that of the wind howling and blowing the snow off the railings. The air releases a fresh scent like sweet mountain dew. Ahhh…

And there’s no one outside. Except for a quick moment, a young couple walks up to their apartment. They happen to be my next door neighbors. So, what do decent neighbors do in the least, but give each other the obligatory pleasantries, right? This is Pleasantville, after all.

Or is it?

It’s only been a short while since it stopped snowing. And the sun seems to be enjoying its short reign. Though at this time, I couldn’t stand the cold any longer, so I head on back inside my warm and cozy pad. It’s a normal late afternoon, like any other. I come home from work and cook dinner, do my email chores, watch a little TV, listen to last.fm and finally, I hit the sack.

I did say I’m tired, didn’t I?

It’s only 8pm and I have no problem retiring this early. Oh no, not right now. I turn off the lamp and away to dreamland I go. Yes, I’m gone like a baby on a full tank of Gerber.

A couple of hours into hibernation mode, however, I awake to a loud banging of my bedroom wall. The side my head is almost touching, as a matter of fact. I open my eyes and lift my head up to the rude and disturbing sound of moans, groans and grunts. Oh, great! And I thought my wall was going to come down. It’s alive, it’s alive, I thought! I am half awake at this point. Hence, it takes me a few seconds to realize that my friendly neighbors are, in fact, a little too close for my own comfort.

To be honest, I came to be amused by this rumbling event, for the next minute or two. But, come on now… when you really need to sleep, it kinda gets old real quick. Having to cover my head with pillows gets annoying, eventually. Especially, when the noise is too loud to mask, to begin with. And next thing you know, it’s freakin’ two in the morning!

And they’re still at it???

I mean, I can appreciate the enthusiasm but, what’s in it for me, at this point?

So, I stand up and head to the bathroom. I look in the mirror and realize… I might not be in Pleasantville, after all.

Maybe… Disturbia?